First, I’d like to say thank you to Kanye, for asking questions this week, it must be hard being the world’s premier ego, a major recording artist and the head of digital media for the Oxford University Press. To do all that and still spare some time for the little people, that’s how you know someone’s real.
Then obviously, I’d like to thank God, because with ‘him’ nothing is my responsibility, and nothing is my fault.
Thank you to my Mum and Dad, without whom I wouldn’t be here today. Or anywhere, ever, if you follow the causal chain far enough back.
I’d like to thank everyone I’ve ever worked with, all the illustrators and questioneers, I literally (and without humour) couldn’t do this without you. If you’ve asked questions, then you’ve actually created this. You’ve helped me overcome writer’s block on a daily basis. You’ve allowed me to be creative even though I don’t actually ever have any ideas. You are wonderful.
If you’ve illustrated, then you’ve made this all worthwhile. You’ve made this site something people might actually look at. Not only that, but you’ve provided constant motivation. Seeing what you come up with has been what’s kept me going. Knowing I’ve got someone willing to spare some time, waiting for me to send something interesting, gives me something to write for. And it’s always something worth writing for. Always something a thousand times better than my writing.
Thank you to the readers. Without you I wouldn’t spend as much time looking at bar charts. And I wouldn’t occasionally feel like maybe I touch people sometimes. Thanks particularly to the people that comment and tweet. You make me feel like maybe I’m occasionally barking up the right tree.
A particular thank you goes to Anna-Kaisa, for helping create the whole idea. And I want to thank all the illustrators again, because quite frankly, between you, you’ve given as much time to this as I have, and that’s phenomenal.
I’d thank Beyoncé, but I genuinely don’t know what video Kanye’s talking about. And I’d thank Taylor Swift, but I honestly don’t care.
To make up for being mean earlier, I’m going to read you all a poem that’s about God. It doesn’t have to be about God if you don’t want it to, that’s the secret. The word God is flexier than you think.
i thank You God for most this amazing
day:for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky; and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes
(i who have died am alive again today,
and this is the sun’s birthday; this is the birth
day of life and of love and wings: and of the gay
great happening illimitably earth)
how should tasting touching hearing seeing
breathing any–lifted from the no
of all nothing–human merely being
doubt unimaginable You?
(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)
Illustration by Andy.
Last Saturday was Unstruck’s First birthday. Happy birthday Unstruck. And that’s the why of the speech. Thank you for taking part.